Host Locutus says:
After previously being turned to a flying garbage ship the USS Good Smithereens has received her latest mission, to undergo grammar lessons due to the recent malfunction of all the universal translators.

Host Locutus says:
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CO_Tribble says:
::Sitting on the bridge::

XO_BarbieDoll says:
::sitting next to the CO on the bridge::

OPS_Somebody says:
::Standing when he should be sitting at the OPS station effectively blocking the view screen::

Host Adm_Moo_T_Cow says:
@::In the process of arriving on this garbage scow::

CO_Tribble says:
OPS: Time till the admiral arrives... and please move your head to one side

CTO_TriggerHappy says:
::Standing on the bridge at tactical, located somewhere in the back::

OPS_Somebody says:
::Glances down at the readout:: CO: He's in transit now Captain

CO_Tribble says:
Self: Great OPS: Acknowledge ... All: who wants to go meet him ?

XO_BarbieDoll says:
::Sinks lower in her seat::

CTO_TriggerHappy says:
CO: I'm detecting a ship on LRS

CO_Tribble says:
::Looks at the XO:: XO: Thak you for volunteering CTO: Who is it

Host Adm_Moo_T_Cow says:
@:: Closing fast on the USS Garbage, seeing as he's in a type two shuttle, and "full speed" for the garbage is full thrusters::

OPS_Somebody says:
::Looks at the seat and wonders who put it there?::

CTO_TriggerHappy says:
::Looks at sensor's:: CO: It's the admiral, Sir

CO_Tribble says:
CTO: Thank you

Host Adm_Moo_T_Cow says:
@COM: Garbage: Federation Garbage ship Garbage, this is the Shuttlecraft Taylor. I, personal pronoun first person, am preparing to dock to your, personal pronoun, third person vessel.

CO_Tribble says:
XO: Guess you better go meet him then but take your time on the way back

XO_BarbieDoll says:
::Hears a strange noise behind her, and spins her head around::

OPS_Somebody says:
::Goes a little ridged and looks around:: CO: Captain permission to be seated?

Host Adm_Moo_T_Cow says:
@COM: Garbage: We have vays ov making you vespond to my hails.

XO_BarbieDoll says:
::Grabs the COs arm::  CO: Did you hear that?

CO_Tribble says:
::Looks at OPS and frowns:: OPS: Certainly I guess that's what its there for, might stop you from blocking the main Viewer as well ::Smiles::

CO_Tribble says:
XO: Hear what ?

OPS_Somebody says:
CO: Incoming hail from the Admiral's ship Captain

OPS_Somebody says:
::Still waiting for permission to be seated::

CO_Tribble says:
OPS: Put it on screen now I can see it thank you

CO_Tribble says:
OPS: And please sit down

XO_BarbieDoll says:
::Hears the words  'tribble,  kill the tribble, kill, kill kill......::

Host Adm_Moo_T_Cow says:
@:: Cuts to impulse, heading fast for the garbage can that passes for a shuttlebay on that ship::

OPS_Somebody says:
::Sits down in his seat and activates the view screen::

CO_Tribble says:
::Looks around as she hears a noise:: XO: You mean that noise ?

XO_BarbieDoll says:
::Spins around so fast that her hair falls out of her Captain Janeway style barrette::

XO_BarbieDoll says:
::Looks at the CO dazedly,::

XO_BarbieDoll says:
CO: What did you hear?

CO_Tribble says:
XO: Kill Barbie.... you ?

OPS_Somebody says:
::Rolls eyes wondering if the XO's 2 brain cell have met yet?::

CO_Tribble says:
COM: Adm: This is the Captain

XO_BarbieDoll says:
::Looks confused::  CO: I heard Kill tribble.  I think someone doesn't like us,  agree?

Host Adm_Moo_T_Cow says:
@COM: CO: Captain. All your base are belong to me.

Host Adm_Moo_T_Cow says:
@COM: CO: Requesting permission to dock.

CTO_TriggerHappy says:
All: A get it off of me, get it of off me ::runs around the bridge screaming::

OPS_Somebody says:
::Jumps out of his seat, effectively blocking the viewscreen::

CO_Tribble says:
::Nods:: XO: I concur ... COM ADM: permission granted Sir

CO_Tribble says:
XO: So who do you think it is ?

OPS_Somebody says:
::Stares down at the chair and looks behind, and beneath it before shaking his head::

Host Adm_Moo_T_Cow says:
@::Docks, quite nicely, and steps out of his shuttlecraft::

CO_Tribble says:
XO: You wanna go meet this Admiral

OPS_Somebody says:
CO: Captain there is something wrong with this chair?

CO_Tribble says:
OPS: What is it

OPS_Somebody says:
CO: Well Sir...it ...it groped me....

Host Adm_Moo_T_Cow says:
::Had been quite expecting someone to come and meet him, steps out of the bay and into a turbolift:: TL: Deck one, bridge.

CO_Tribble says:
::Looks at the CTO:: CTO: Anything the matter

CO_Tribble says:
::Raises eyebrows:: OPS: Groped you .... you sure ?

XO_BarbieDoll1 says:
::Looks around as she come out of her daze::

OPS_Somebody says:
::Notices the CTO winking at him::

CTO_TriggerHappy says:
::Notices the OPS winking at me, gets scared and heads back to tactical:: CO: Is anything the matter? Yes!, I felt a hand underneath my shirt and Somebody is winking at me

XO_BarbieDoll1 says:
CO: You wanted me to see who sir?

Host Adm_Moo_T_Cow says:
::Arrives on the bridge, and steps out::

CO_Tribble says:
XO: The Admiral

CO_Tribble says:
CTO: Somebody .. who ? ::Smiles::

OPS_Somebody says:
::Frowns at the CTO, and turns back to the CO: CO: Captain I request permission to arm myself and dissolve any such unwanted advanced from protruding and offensive limbs

Host Adm_Moo_T_Cow says:
CO: Captain. Titular noun. I'd like to say that it is a pleasure to meet you, but Vulcans do not suffer from lying.

CTO_TriggerHappy says:
::Hears a noise and pick's up phaser and point it at the admiral::

XO_BarbieDoll1 says:
::Looks at the CO as if she's crazy::  CO: Who did you want me to meet?  that guy there?  ::points to the Adm.::

CO_Tribble says:
ADM: I’m sure we are thinking along the same lines ... welcome aboard Sir

CTO_TriggerHappy says:
CO: No not somebody, Somebody!!!, You know OPS

CO_Tribble says:
OPS: No who would want to grope you ...

Host Locutus says:
ACTION: The ship temperature begins to raise

Host Adm_Moo_T_Cow says:
CO: Your greeting is acknowledged. Are you capable of using the apostrophe?

OPS_Somebody says:
CO: I have my suspicions sir....

CO_Tribble says:
::Nods to thre XO:: XO: Never mind go see what somebody's problem is

CO_Tribble says:
OPS: You do .. oh please tell I’m interested

OPS_Somebody says:
::Shrugs his shoulders and decides to head over to the CTO::

CO_Tribble says:
ADM: An apostrophe .. I’m sorry what’s one of those .. I’m just a mere Captain Sir

Host Adm_Moo_T_Cow says:
::Sighs:: Outloud: The ship's, with an 'apostrophe s'. because the temperature, the object of the action, is possessed by the subject, the ship.

CTO_TriggerHappy says:
::Lowers phaser:: Self: Gee I point a phaser at the Admiral and nobody (not to be confused with Somebody) notices.

CO_Tribble says:
::Feels a hand under her skirt:: Adm: Sir we have just only met

XO_BarbieDoll1 says:
::Shivers as she feels a presence behind her, and a hand slowly creeps up under her shirt::

Host Adm_Moo_T_Cow says:
CO: Cadets, Captain, are capable of using basic Grammar. Vulcan children play with exercise books that are more advanced.

OPS_Somebody says:
CTO: Listen just to let you know....I am not interested in the slightest in you so keep your appendages to yourself of risk losing them ::storms back to his chair::

CTO_TriggerHappy says:
All: I know how to use a apostrophe, they make good boomerangs

Host Adm_Moo_T_Cow says:
ALL: And plural forms?

CO_Tribble says:
Adm:: Brushes what she thinks is a hand away:: never had the pleasure Sir .. so how can we help to make you stay as comfortable as possible

XO_BarbieDoll1 says:
::Wonders whose hand is up her shirt, and when it's going to reach the mouse trap she left there::

Host Adm_Moo_T_Cow says:
CO: You may assemble the crew on the bridge. Everyone should have a PADD and stylus.

XO_BarbieDoll1 says:
::Moves over to the CO and whispers::  CO: Captain, someone was....touching me.

CO_Tribble says:
::Nods getting annoyed with the hand up her skirt:: Adm: As you wish Sir .....

CO_Tribble says:
XO: get the crew assembled with padds ect

Host Adm_Moo_T_Cow says:
::Takes out his PADD, and fountain style::

OPS_Somebody says:
::Grabs a Padd and stylus and waits breathtakingly for the Admirals first word::

CO_Tribble says:
::Looks as she grabs a padd:: XO: Might be best if you didn't wink at me ... will give the crew ideas

CTO_TriggerHappy says:
ADM: Admiral. I ate my PADD

XO_BarbieDoll1 says:
::Jumps back from the CO::  CO: Why are you winking at me sir?

Host Adm_Moo_T_Cow says:
::Decides that this crew is simply too much, takes the pen, and, to create one of the four obligatory R rated scenes, sticks it through his eye, until it reaches his brain, and continues stick it thorough, until it kills him::

XO_BarbieDoll1 says:
::Realises that they both said the same thing at the same time::

CO_Tribble says:
::Looks at the Adm:: XO: I was not you were winking at me

Host CO_Tribble says:
::Shrugs at the XO:: OPS: have you got your problem sorted now ?

XO_BarbieDoll1 says:
CO: Sir,  something strange is going on here.  I think we should investigate.  Did you feel someone touching you earlier?  I had the sensation of someone reaching under my shirt

OPS_Somebody says:
::kicks the Admiral making sure that he is indeed dead::

CTO_TriggerHappy says:
CO: I recommend we stick the admirals body in a torpedo tube; It will save us a torpedo or two.

Host CO_Tribble says:
::Nods at the XO:: Yes I did .. remove the admirals body please ... CTO: best find out what it is

Host CO_Tribble says:
CTO: Oh now that’s a good Idea

OPS_Somebody says:
CO: Sir incoming hail from grammar section 31

Host CO_Tribble says:
OPS: Who ? put them on screen then

CTO_TriggerHappy says:
CO: Sorry, Sir that was me, case closed

OPS_Somebody says:
::Shrugs as he as no idea who this secret linguistic unit really is and activates the viewscreen putting the hail through::

XO_BarbieDoll1 says:
::Mutters to herself::  Self: I get all the good jobs!  ::starts lugging the body to the ships furnace::

Host CO_Tribble says:
COM: Grammer: This is Captain Tribble ... may I ask who and what you are

Host Locutus says:
<Grammar Section 31> Com: USS Good Smithereens: CO: Greetings, we've like to speak with Admiral Moo T. Cow please. ::Smiles widely and taps his finger on the desk in front of him::

CTO_TriggerHappy says:
::Calls a security team to hull the admiral away::

OPS_Somebody says:
::Stares in awe at the viewscreen::

Host CO_Tribble says:
COM: Grammer : Oh really .. oh ::looks  a little worried:: well I’m afraid that will not be appropriate at this moment in time

Host Locutus says:
<Grammar Section 31> Com: USS Good Smithereens: CO: ::Raises an eyebrow:: And why's that?

CTO_TriggerHappy says:
::Cuts the view screen:: CO: Sir, I have an idea

XO_BarbieDoll says:
::Wonders how the CO is going to explain the ADMs actions, knowing the history of the ship::

Host CO_Tribble says:
@::Clears her throat:: COM: Grammar .... well he's errm he's not actually quite with us at the moment

Host CO_Tribble says:
::Looks at the CTO as coms are cut:: CTO: Spit it out

OPS_Somebody says:
::Stares down at his console and his eyes widen:: CO: Sir, it seems the Admiral was quite a windbag, with the XO throwing the Admiral's body into the furnace...the warp core has come on line

Host CO_Tribble says:
::Waits on the CTO::

Host Locutus says:
<Grammar Section 31> Com: USS Good Smithereens: CO: ::Sighs:: Don't tell me he did that pencil trick on you? ::Shakes his head:: He can't die from that, he just does that because.. ::Pauses:: He's insane. If you'll be kind enough to wake him up from where he landed please?

XO_BarbieDoll says:
::Walks back onto the bridge, and sits down next to the CO::

CTO_TriggerHappy says:
CO: Okay here's what we do, we take the admirals body and put him in your chair. Then we shoot electricity through his body to make him move, then someone can imitate his voice.

Host CO_Tribble says:
::Hears the voice on the view screen and looks with horror:: XO: Where's the admirals body ?

XO_BarbieDoll says:
::Suddenly realises what’s happened, but then feels someone stroking her hand::

Host CO_Tribble says:
OPS: Cut comms chuck some static there, make it look like there was a fault

Host CO_Tribble says:
XO: Will you go get the admirals body !

XO_BarbieDoll says:
::whispers::  CO: He's in the......

XO_BarbieDoll says:
CO: in the.....

OPS_Somebody says:
::Cut comms and sticks the microphone into his goldfishes bowl::

XO_BarbieDoll says:
::Passes out in the XOs chair::

Host CO_Tribble says:
ALL: Errm did we just kill the Adm ?

OPS_Somebody says:
CO: Captain we have warp speed available I say we make a run for it

Host CO_Tribble says:
OPS: Yep I tend to agree with you .. go for it

Host CO_Tribble says:
CTO: Red Alert .. if we have one and bring weapons on line just in case

XO_BarbieDoll says:
::Is still sprawled out on in her chair, unconscious with the knowledge she killed the Adm.::

Host CO_Tribble says:
::Shakes the XO to get her to come round ::

OPS_Somebody says:
::Sits down in his chair and plots an escape  course: CO: Warp 2 is available Captain:: waits for the finger wagging engage part::

XO_BarbieDoll says:
::Slowly comes out of the faint::  Self: Murderer, murderer!!

CTO_TriggerHappy says:
::brings weapons online and fires at the other ship::

OPS_Somebody says:
CO: Captain we have the Enterprize on a intercept course

Host CO_Tribble says:
OPS: Just hit the button and get us out of here ::Smiles:: please

CTO_TriggerHappy says:
::Fires a volley of torpedo's::

XO_BarbieDoll says:
::Is propped in her chair, still murmuring 'murderer'::

Host Locutus says:
ACTION: The Admiral's body comes out from the ship and hits the other ship

Host CO_Tribble says:
::Sits in the CO chair and purs like a tribble:: XO: Accidents happen

OPS_Somebody says:
::Turns to face the CO:: CO: That is hardly appropriate Captain, I really think you should use the correct terminology ::smiles at the CO::

Host CO_Tribble says:
::Sighs:: OPS: If we must ... engage .. happy now ?

XO_BarbieDoll says:
::Looks over at the CO::  CO: So I'm not going to jail?

Host CO_Tribble says:
XO: No no ... not with out all of us with you at any rate

OPS_Somebody says:
CO: Perfectly ::hits the bright red button and watches at the ship screams off a warp 2::

Host CO_Tribble says:
OPS: Good.. would hate to disappoint you ::Smiles:: how's the chair ?

XO_BarbieDoll says:
::Wails::  Self: I'm going to go to jail!!!!!!!!

OPS_Somebody says:
CO: Captain 2 minutes to intercept the Enterprize is gaining on us, even at maximum warp

Host CO_Tribble says:
CTO: Time to intercept

Host CO_Tribble says:
OPS: Well compensate and give us more power then

CTO_TriggerHappy says:
CO: Did you see the admirals body rip through the haul of that other ship?

Host CO_Tribble says:
CTO: No was it good and what damage did it do

OPS_Somebody says:
CTO: Pinpoint accuracy

OPS_Somebody says:
CO: We have no power.....

Host CO_Tribble says:
OPS: Then find some .. How about her ::looks at the XO::

OPS_Somebody says:
::Drags the XO off to the furnace and stuffs her body in::

CTO_TriggerHappy says:
::Floods 3 lower decks with a neural paralysing agent::

Host CO_Tribble says:
ALL: Status ?

OPS_Somebody says:
CO: Captain warp power is back online, warp speed is ready at your disposal Ma'am

Host CO_Tribble says:
OPS: get on with it then or do I really have to say that awful word again ?

OPS_Somebody says:
::Nods at the CO:: CO: Yes you do!

CTO_TriggerHappy says:
::Gets teams loading the torpedo with all the paralysed bodies:: CO: All torpedo tubes are loaded

Host CO_Tribble says:
::Sighs:: OPS: Is that the only word your ever respond to ? ::Smiles realising what she said:: you best engage then

Host Locutus says:
ACTION: Incoming torpedoes

OPS_Somebody says:
CO: Sir and you have to do the finger wagging part as well....

Host CO_Tribble says:
OPS: Geez anything else !? ::Points her finger:: engage .. how’s that ?

CTO_TriggerHappy says:
::Fingers slips and launches bodies at the Enterprize::

Host Locutus says:
ACTION: Direct hit, there goes the warpcore

OPS_Somebody says:
CO: Captain direct hit warp core breech in progress

Host CO_Tribble says:
OPS: Eject the core

Host CO_Tribble says:
OPS: Or is there anther word for that too ?

OPS_Somebody says:
::Ejects the warp core and engages thrusters ::

Host Locutus says:
ACTION: Direct hit on the USS Enterprize, forward shields are down

CTO_TriggerHappy says:
All: Woo hoo. Enterprize foward shields are down

Host CO_Tribble says:
::Smiles:: CTO: excellent .. keep it up

OPS_Somebody says:
CTO: Great shot

CTO_TriggerHappy says:
::Launches bodies, full spread::

Host CO_Tribble says:
OPS: status ?

OPS_Somebody says:
CO: Well I'm 25 single, but I don't believe that's any of your concern!

CTO_TriggerHappy says:
CO: And to think all this time we were using matter/antimatter reactions to destroy ships

Host Locutus says:
ACTION: The USS Enterprize goes boom

Host CO_Tribble says:
OPS: I think it is .. but its up for discussion at a later date ::Smiles:: the status of the ship

Host CO_Tribble says:
CTO: Well make sure you have a good collection Encase we need em again

OPS_Somebody says:
CO: Were back to thrusters only and the we have a limited number of crew left

Host CO_Tribble says:
OPS: Enough to run the ship I hope ?

OPS_Somebody says:
CO: Apparently so Ma'am

Host CO_Tribble says:
OPS: Well then that’s fine get us out of here and as far away as possible

CTO_TriggerHappy says:
OPS: Limited crew ::thinks when he paralysed all the crew:: It's her fault ::fires phaser at a lone SO in the corner::

OPS_Somebody says:
:: Sets a course and waits for the finger wagging and the impressive word::

Host CO_Tribble says:
::Looks at the OPS officer and sighs:: OPS: Engage ::points finger::

OPS_Somebody says:
::Engages thrusters and the ship surges ahead::

Host Locutus says:
And so they have engaged, to where? only the future will tell.

Host Locutus says:
To Be Continued...

Host Locutus says:
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